I was trying to paint a picture today, but seems the color i was using was just a pigment of my imagination...


And this is what I love about him. He looks like a deranged teacher on crack during the first ever documented case of permanent male PMS, he talks like a professor who swallowed a drunk sailor, and his explanations are so simple and clear you have an urge to take notes



You cant sell news stories that have data and cautious predictions. Where is the panic? Where is the impending doom? C'mon people , give me something to work with here…

    Opinions / Science / Theory of Relative Ignorance  

George Carlin - St. George and the dragon

George Carlin is the second half of bill hicks. If hick was trying to get the demons of stupidity out of your head, George Carlin was the Jekyll to your high school chemistry teacher. He was an educator all right, but he wasn’t really someone you can bring to the teacher's lounge for a cup of tea and biscuits.

And this is what I love about him. He looks like a deranged teacher on crack during the first ever documented case of permanent male PMS, he talks like a professor who swallowed a drunk sailor, and his explanations are so simple and clear you have an urge to take notes.

George Carlin new what was going on, and was adamant about sharing this information with us. It was not a sermon, he was not preaching, he was explaining and getting pissed of at us, the classroom because we just sit there and don’t do our homework.
Or at least start a little revolution.

I love and treasure individuals as I meet them,
I loathe and despise the groups they identify with and belong to.

Words of wisdom. No doubt about it. And Carlin was always against that kind of mindless mob mentality, herd of zombies listening to the wrong people and going around in circles playing the game we never asked for or needed.
He was really trying to change things, to make people understand what exactly is happening to them, and you could see the pain in his eyes when he saw all he got was laughs. If bill hicks reaction to the apathy and stupidity was rage and disgust , Carlin showed more and more sorrow and frustration.
So I say live and let live. That's my motto. Live and let live. Anyone who can't go along with that, take him outside and shoot the motherfucker. It's a simple philosophy, but it's always worked in our family.
As the years passed, you could see that Carlin was less funny and more deliberate, more intentional, touching people's hearts and soaring way above the realms of just entertainment.
Let me get a sip of water here...you figure this stuff is safe to drink? [audience yells "No"] Actually, I don't care, I drink it anyway. You know why? 'Cause I'm an American and I expect a little cancer in my food and water. I'm a loyal American and I'm not happy unless I let government and industry poison me a little bit every day.
There are a lot of ways to make fun of something, many ways to pass your message. Absurdity in real life is always a challenge, but when executed with the surgical executioner style of George Carlin, it is a true art form. It's not sarcasm, it's not straight humor, slapstick humor, he doesn’t do voices, he doesn’t care about theatrics, he is just taking real experience one notch up. That's all. That's enough so the normal level of absurdity overflows and we start to smell something fishy. And THAT is his talent. Minute manipulations of reality, a gentle stroke of genius that lets out the truth and the way we really are.

Here's another question I have. How come when it's us, it's an abortion, and when it's a chicken, it's an omelette?

Are we so much better than chickens all of a sudden? When did this happen; that we passed chickens in goodness? Name six ways we're better than chickens... See, nobody can do it! You know why? 'Cause chickens are decent people.

You don't see chickens hanging around in drug gangs, do you? No. You don't see a chicken strapping some guy into a chair and hooking up his nuts to a car battery, do you?... When's the last chicken you heard about came home from work and beat the shit out of his hen, huh? Doesn't happen... 'cause chickens are decent people.


But to write about George Carlin is like to paint about Picasso. He says it best in his own words :


I'm a modern man, a man for the millennium, digital and smoke-free. A diversified multicultural postmodern deconstructionist. Politically, anatomically, and ecologically incorrect. I've been uplinked and downloaded, I've been inputted and outsourced, I know the upside of downsizing, I know the downside of upgrading.
I'm a high-tech lowlife. A cutting-edge, state-of-the-art, bicoastal multitasker and I can give you a gigabyte in a nanosecond.

I'm new wave, but I'm old school, and my inner child is outward bound. I'm a hot-wired, heat-seeking, warm-hearted cool customer, voice-activated and biodegradable. I interface with my database, and my database is in cyberspace, so I'm interactive, I'm hyperactive, and from time to time I'm radioactive. Behind the eight ball, ahead of the curve, riding the wave, dodging a bullet, pushing the envelope. I'm on point, on task, on message, and off drugs. I got no need for coke and speed, I got no urge to binge and purge.

I'm in the moment, on the edge, over the top, but under the radar. A high-concept, low-profile, medium-range ballistic missionary. A street-wise smart bomb, a top-gun bottom feeder.
I wear power ties, I tell power lies, I take power naps, I run victory laps. I'm a totally ongoing bigfoot slam dunk rainmaker with a proactive outreach. A raging workaholic; a working rageaholic. Out of rehab, and in denial. I've got a personal trainer, a personal shopper, a personal assistant, and a personal agenda.

You can't shut me up, you can't dumb me down. 'Cause I'm tireless, and I'm wireless, I'm an alpha male on beta blockers. I'm a non-believer and an over-achiever, laid-back but fashion forward. Up front, down home, low-rent, high-maintenance. Super-size, long-lasting, high-definition, fast-acting, oven-ready, and built to last. I'm a hands-on, foot-loose, knee-jerk, headcase. Prematurely post-traumatic, and I have a love child who sends me hate mail. But I'm feeling, I'm caring, I'm healing, I'm sharing, a supportive bonding nurturing primary caregiver.

My output is down, but my income is up. I take a short position on the long bond, and my revenue stream has its own cash flow. I read junk mail, I eat junk food, I buy junk bonds, I watch trash sports. I'm gender-specific, capital-intensive, user-friendly, and lactose-intolerant. I like rough sex, I like tough love, I use the F-word in my E-Mail, and the software on my hard drive is hardcore, no soft porn.

I bought a microwave at a mini mall;I bought a mini van in a mega store. I eat fast food in the slow lane. I'm toll-free, bite-sized, ready-to-wear, and I come in all sizes. A fully-equipped, factory-authorized, hospital-tested, clinically-proven, scientifically formulated medical miracle. I've been pre-washed, pre-cooked, pre-heated, pre-screened, pre-approved, pre-packaged, post-dated, freeze-dried, double-wrapped, vacuum-packed, and I have an unlimited broadband capacity.

I'm a rude dude, but I'm the real deal, lean and mean. Cocked, locked and ready to rock. Rough tough and hard to bluff. I take it slow, I go with the flow, I ride with the tide, I got glide in my stride. Drivin' and movin', sailin' and spinnin', jivin' and groovin', wailin' and winnin.' I don't snooze, so I don't lose. I keep the pedal to the metal and the

Religion http://youtu.be/MeSSwKffj9o
Stuff http://youtu.be/MvgN5gCuLac